Too young to get married

"Don't you think you're still  too young to get married?"

I've gotten this question a few times already, mostly from Chinese friends. Not to stereotype or anything, but I guess Chinese people usually get married around 25-30 years old, and my mere 23 (next year, that is) is rather...shocking. Granted, if I see a Chinese peer from secondary school or primary school married/getting married, I'd immediately assume it was a shotgun marriage. =P 

Still. 

Another acquaintance (yes, ONLY an acquaintance because "She's getting married next year" is practically my surname when introduced nowadays) was shocked when the announcement was made. He couldn't believe I was getting married "so early". Even double-checked to see if I was getting engaged or married next year, whereupon I flashed him my ring. =P

A friend who asked this question said that she wouldn't marry early because felt she hadn't done enough with her life yet before settling down. 

I think one of the main reasons that has surfaced again and again is people don't want to be 'tied down' at such an early age. Some people wanna travel the world first. They like being free and unfettered. Some may be commitment-phobic, and to make this decision seems like a HUGE thing at my age when most aren't done with the dating scene/game yet.

Some of these reasons didn't even occur to me, because : 

1) I have been in an LDR for the past (almost) 6 years, and all that time, I've had the freedom to act as though I was single. By that, I don't mean flirt around. I just mean he didn't restrict me in any way, and he didn't take up my every second of every day. I basically chatted with him for an hour or so daily, and the other +/- 23 hours of my life went on as usual with my friends and family and dog and sleeping and...any activities I enjoyed, of which few exist. =P It's to his credit that he isn't the jealous, possessive type, and I really appreciate that. So no, I don't feel like I'm "tying" myself down.

2) I'm pretty sure if I wanted to explore the world further, he'd encourage me to. In fact, isn't it even better to explore it together? Always fun to travel with a companion. (Actually, he'd probably be the one egging me on since I DON'T have any particular desire to explore the world *cough*)

3) I've dated him for almost 6 years already, and it's only natural to move on to another stage in the relationship. If it were a two-year thing, it might be a little early to start planning a wedding, especially since we're still so young.

4) Why do I have this list thing going on? Can't I write a proper post with paragraphs? Hmm.

But I guess I do get it. I used to tell people I wouldn't wanna date until I reached my 20s, and that I wanted to enjoy singlehood as much as I could. At that time, I also believed that guys my age were juvenile and immature and I was just waiting to hit the university years and see all the other hot guys the world out there.

When I fell in love, though, things changed. I'll spare you the soppy stuff, but let me just tell you this : I've never dated anyone else, and I can't say for sure that there isn't a better match for me out there somewhere (Sorry Jwern :P), but I do know I COULD and WANT TO spend the rest of my life with one of my favouritest people in the world. Perhaps it's just how our personalities meld together. I certainly wouldn't recommend that you to get tied down *cough* to a possessive guy with an ego the size of the moon and who also intends to keep you domesticated and locked up in the house for the rest of your life, especially if you're a free spirit who has a bucket list and a lust for adventure.

And as long as babies don't come along, I don't see how I'm tied down, really. =P

Besides, I've always prioritized close relationships. I've read enough of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series and self-help books to know that at the end of your life, you're not going to care about your reputation, or your career, or your success  - what matters most is your loved ones and the legacy of love that you left behind. And on my deathbed, I want to look back with no regrets, knowing that I had spent the bulk of my years in companionship with my beloved because I had married early.

(Note to self : The next time someone asks me the same question, I'm just gonna link them to this lengthy post. Phew.)

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