Behind the Facebook Profile

Authenticity.

What a big word. To me, it means being courageous enough to show all facets of my true self to others, and not hiding parts of me that I deem weaknesses. But so often I catch myself only posting up happy, bubbly, positive thoughts and moments on Facebook, and I am careful not to reveal the more negative sides of myself. Don't you sometimes get the feeling that some friends on Facebook are are such wonderful people and are constantly positive? I think it's the same case here - maybe deep inside, we all strive to maintain an immaculate image so that people won't judge us for the worse.

I think it's good to be authentic, to let others know that we face the same struggles, that perfection does not exist. To make up for that, here's the whole package. #nofilter

Nope, I am not always smiling or joking, I cry sometimes when I get overwhelmed (and I've been doing a lot of that lately), I get angry when others "waste" my time by being inefficient (whether it is getting lost on the road or being unnecessarily long-winded during a briefing), and I'm a terrible cook, musician and artist.

I probably have less patience than 95% of the human population, and I can be very clumsy. I don't care enough about a lot of things - hence the lack of makeup or lady-likeness (long-suffering husband, I love you so much for accepting me this way =P).

I am also extremely vulnerable to verbal criticism about my character. I sometimes feel that I don't care enough, or that I care too much, I don't work hard enough, and I am too unambitious. When comparing myself with others, I feel that everyone else has a glowing resume, but I'm too commitment-phobic to even work part time. I'm also really unadventurous - give me a book or a blog over jungle-trekking any day. I feel that I don't have many of the qualities 21st century employers want.

After all that has been said, I'm grateful that there are people who still love me despite all my imperfections and weaknesses.

Not my Facebook friends, mind you - they might not necessarily know. =P

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