Contentment

It's hard to be objective.

On one hand, it's nice to hold firmly to a set of principles - to know where you stand exactly. On the other, I've been on both sides of the spectrum, and I now know that it's difficult to say that any one thing is the THE ultimate principle.

So, with that being said, I will speak for myself, and only myself.

I feel that there's no point in striving so hard. If eternal life is the end goal, why is it necessary to fuss about the little things in life? Is there a point in striving for excellence, other than excellence of character? Is it right to push myself so hard that I become unhappy and tired, and lead a miserable existence because nothing is ever good enough?

Perhaps some people thrive on competition, but I don't. I feel that competing brings out the worst in me. It makes me status-conscious, it makes me attach my self-worth to my achievements, and it also makes me prideful and arrogant if I do emerge victorious. I have always admired people who, even though they are talented and resilient, do not feel the need to parade their achievements. The past few years have seen me actively trying to detach myself from the trap of competition (old habits die hard), and I think I can safely say that I am a more balanced individual now.

My goal is to strive to be happy, to lead a simple life, to not work more than I need to, and to exploit my God-given gifts to the maximum without wasting too much time or effort. I constantly look around me and realize that the world goes round the way it does, with so many people living an average life. "Average" does not mean "insignificant". I can be a humble, average person who makes a difference in the lives of those around me. For all those quotes about how one has to be extraordinary or unique or outstanding, I still believe that it's alright to be a perfectly normal, average individual. If that weren't so, why did God create each and every one of us with different degrees of abilities and talents? God certainly didn't make every one of us prodigies, and He loves the least of us as much as the most accomplished of us.

Having said that, I also know that some people just do things well because it makes them happy to see their effort culminate in an awesome product. For instance, I like writing, and I try my best to produce grammatically-accurate paragraphs as far as possible. If you ask me for a favour related to editorial work or translation, I would take it because it's something I enjoy (somewhat). I don't claim to be the best writer (I'm far from it, and I don't think I'll EVER write a book), but it's something I think I can do somewhat decently. Back to the point, if someone does something excellently simply because of talent or sheer passion, I am all for that. However, if one is driven to perfection by other factors, such as seeking the approval of others, or recognition, or competition, or plain insecurity, then I think there's something wrong with the picture. Usually people who are motivated by the aforementioned characteristics end up unhappy, stressed out and burned out because they're trying to stretch themselves to their limit - and to what end? Is the approval of others that important? The irony is that people like that usually lose all their friends and burn many bridges in the process. And this, to me, is not a worthwhile sacrifice.

So I'll end this by saying I want to be happy, contented, and grateful for all that God has given me including friends and family. I heard recently that people perceive me as having 'everything' - I do not have 'everything', but I am content with what I have. And that's the best thing.

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